A Drunken Marriage of Autumn Fire
by SaurusRock625
Summary: When Jaune became the hero of Vale, he found out the hard way that famous people are far more miserable than they let on. So what does he do to alleviate his misery? Why get stone drunk and married to the Fall Maiden of course! Wait, what was that last part?
1. Chapter 1

_**After reading so many Drunken Marriage stories by people like Blaiseingfire and Cyberleader2000, I've decided to contribute to the Drunken Marriage community. But I want you all to understand that this story WILL NOT go above a T on the rating scale. Anyway, I hope you guys enjoy this one. Also, to all of those who didn't want Penny to die in the Vytal Incident, I want you all to know that Penny did not die in my story. She survived, but requires major repairs to her body.**_

 _ ***RWBY AND ALL OF ITS CHARACTERS ARE NOT OWNED BY ME!***_

* * *

 _ **A Knight and an Autumn Maiden's Drunken Night Out!**_

* * *

Jaune sighed yet again as he walked through the streets of Vale. A month has passed since the attack on Beacon, and things have pretty much gone back to normal. But unfortunately, he was now considered a famous person. He saved his partner Pyrrha, prevented what surely would've been the fall of Beacon, proved Yang's innocence, stopped Weiss's father from taking her away back to Atlas, prevented Blake from running away from her problems again, managed to drive off Cinder and her flunkies and even managed to return the Fall Maiden's powers to their rightful owner.

And therein lies his problem.

Because he was able to do all of those things, Jaune ended up becoming somewhat of a celebrity in the eyes of Vale and it was beginning to grate on his nerves. He doesn't like being famous, and would rather be a normal person instead of something like this.

He's already had to go to professor Goodwitch for therapy sessions at least three times in that week alone!

Jaune looked across the street and came across a bar that he'd not known about. It was a rustic looking place known as The Dragon's Tavern. Now Jaune isn't normally the type to do any form of drinking, he has had to deal with a LOT of crazy stuff in the past semester alone. That and Nora's hyperactivity causing him many splitting headaches. And this seems like the perfect way for him to just unwind.

"Meh. Why not?" Jaune said to himself. "With all the crazy shit I've had to put up with recently, I could use a little alcohol to drown out my miseries."

Jaune walked into the bar and was surprised to see that it looked more like a Dive rather than an ordinary bar. And from the smell of it, they do serve food here. Good thing too, because Jaune missed dinner that afternoon. He walked over to the bar and decided to get a drink and something to eat before heading back to Beacon. Sitting down at a nearby table, Jaune took a moment to look over the menu.

He'd already decided on what he'd get for a drink. One of the strongest drinks in Remnant. A Hunter's Bane.

"Is this seat taken?" asked a woman's voice.

Looking up from his menu, Jaune was surprised to see Amber Wither, the true Fall Maiden, in a place like this.

"Oh, no please, by all means sit down. I was just looking over the menu." Jaune said.

Amber smiled as she sat down across from Jaune. And despite the really bad scar over her eye and a good portion of her face, Jaune couldn't help but admire the natural beauty that Amber has. And that scar didn't seem to take away from her looks at all.

"So, what's the 'Hero of Vale' doing in a place like this?" Amber asked.

"Can you not call me that, please?" Jaune asked while massaging his temples. "It's bad enough that people I don't even know call me that whenever I just take a walk to my favorite comic book store! I don't need someone I DO know calling me that as well!"

Amber actually winced as she remembered one of those times. She herself had been walking back to the hotel she was staying at until she decided what she wanted to do with herself since the threat on Vale has passed. She had just gotten done with a manicure at a nail salon when she was nearly flattened by a mob of people chasing Jaune. She had vaguely been able to make out requests for autographs and several women shouting about wanting various parts of him.

Mostly articles of clothing like his hoodie or his pants.

"Sorry about how your newfound fame is cutting into your life." Amber said.

"Eh, don't worry about it. I'm sure it'll all blow over soon." Jaune waved off.

But somewhere deep down, they both knew that things were most certainly NOT going to blow over anytime soon.

"Thank you for waiting. May I take your orders?" asked a waitress as she walked up to their table.

"Uh, yes, I'll have an order of spicy buffalo wings with bleu cheese dipping sauce and a Hunter's Bane with no ice, please." Jaune said.

"Make it two, please." Amber added. "But make my order of wings mild."

"Okay, the wings will take about twenty minutes, but your drinks will be here momentarily."

With that, the waitress walked off to get the orders prepared. So Jaune and Amber looked back at each other, ready to continue their conversation.

"As for why I'm here, all the stress and hero worship I've been getting recently has been getting me down, I saw this place and decided to get a drink and something to eat." Jaune said.

Amber nodded in acceptance. She could understand how the most famous people were often the most miserable in life, and could tell that Jaune never even WANTED to be famous.

"So what's your story?" Jaune asked.

"Hm?" muttered Amber as she rose an eyebrow.

"I've told you why I'm here, so why don't you tell me why you're here. I'm more than willing to listen if you just need someone to talk to." Jaune said.

Amber hesitated a bit. She's had a few trust issues ever since her near death at the hands of CInder, Emerald and Mercury. She certainly doesn't trust anyone from any military group, that much is certain. That's why she incinerated all of the Atlas Military's cloning technology and any and all files and blueprints they'd need to rebuild them or make more.

She saw through their ruse. She knows about their attempts at cloning people to make living biological weapons. Even reported that to Ozpin, who quickly got those projects shut down by both the Vale and Atlas councils.

And yet, Amber felt as though she could trust Jaune. After all, he did ensure her survival by getting her power back and having it transferred back into her body. It not only revitalized her soul, but it also physically put her back at eighteen years old. He was far too nice of a guy to just try and take advantage of her in any way.

"Two Hunter's Banes!" said the waitress.

The two warriors thanked her as she walked off to take care of other orders, leaving the two alone to talk.

"Let me tell you something about being one of the four seasons maidens. It's a lonely life." Amber said. "You can never stay in one place for too long, otherwise you're easy prey for those who want to steal your power for themselves. Just like how I was unfortunate enough to have been attacked by those goons and their dark creatures of Grimm."

Amber touched the area where her scar was and winced. It didn't hurt, but the phantom pains of that creature killing her from the inside out and sending her power to that Cinder woman still haunted her nightmares.

Jaune placed a hand on hers and gently rubbed his thumb across her knuckles, drawing a grateful smile from the girl. Any form of comfort after those horrible experiences was most welcome to her.

"Anyway, once I'd been revived thanks to your actions, I started spiralling into a deep depression and decided that I needed a drink. So I ended up here, saw you sitting here and the rest is history." Amber finished.

She looked Jaune in the eye and saw deep concern for her, making her smile. Wandering the world in her time as a Huntress has made Amber very good at reading people, and she could read Jaune like and open book. His concern was genuine, and he had no hidden intentions. He wanted to know about her, Amber Wither. Not the Fall Maiden whose power is coveted by even the most high ranking officials in the world.

"I never got the chance to thank you for saving me." Amber said. "If you hadn't stopped Cinder when you did, I really would be dead and buried right now."

She began to tear up as she thought about her time in that coma. How she had been alive and yet at the same time not alive. Dying but not allowed to die. In the cold, dark limbo between life and death.

She let out a small startled gasp when Jaune placed his hand on her face and used his thumb to wipe away her tears.

"Hey, come on, no tears tonight. Let's not think about the depressing memories of the past." Jaune said.

"That's easier said than done." Amber said. "My past isn't easy to just ignore."

That's when Jaune did something rather unexpected.

He flicked her in the forehead.

"Ow!" yelped Amber. "Hey, what was that for?!"

"It doesn't matter! It's in the past!" Jaune replied.

Amber rubbed her forehead as he eyes narrowed in annoyance. Why the heck would Jaune just flick her in the forehead like that.

"Well, yeah, but it still hurts." whined Amber.

"Yeah, I know. The past can hurt." Jaune conceded before breaking out into a big grin. "But the way I see it, you can either run from it, or… learn from it!"

Jaune went to flick her again to prove his point, but this time Amber moved back a bit and grabbed his wrist to stop him. And this result seemed to make Jaune happy.

"HA! You see? So what are you going to do?" Jaune asked.

"Well first, I'm gonna get you back for that little finger flick." Amber said.

And FLICK! She flicked him in the nose, rather than his forehead. Jaune shot him a mock glare as she laughed at him before he too started to laugh. He must've sounded so much like an old medicine man giving a speech at a seminar, or something. The two barely registered that their food had arrived before they picked up their drinks and raised their glasses.

"Here's to a bright future!" Jaune cheered.

"Here, here!" added Amber.

The two downed their drinks as they continued to talk, laugh, joke around and just all around have a good time. But little did they know that something new would arise from their actions at this tavern.

But would these actions lead to a consequence? Or would it actually feel like more of a reward for all of the shit they've had to put up with?

One thing is certain, a shit storm is coming, and it's gonna be a category five.

* * *

 _ ***To Be Continued…***_

* * *

 _ **Okay, here's my own Drunken Marriage story. As you can see, it's progressing a bit differently than the others I've read in the past, and I hope you all enjoy the Lion King reference I put in there. Don't forget to review and follow. See you guys and gals later!**_


	2. Chapter 2

_**Silly fossil me! I almost forgot to give a huge shoutout to the author who got the Drunken Marriage community up and running in the first place! Let's give a great big hand to the big man in bones… Austin Ga Kill! Hope you guys enjoy this chapter and leave plenty of reviews!**_

 _ ***I STILL DON'T OWN RWBY!***_

* * *

 _ **Filler Chapter: A Spartan's Worry!**_

* * *

The next day at Beacon academy, the morning was progressing in its usual manner. Which means that the students were sleeping in because of the weekend. And in team JNPR's room, all but one of its members were sleeping soundly.

Pyrrha was sitting wide awake on her bed as she struggled to actually STAY awake. Jaune hadn't come back last night and didn't even send them a message as to his whereabouts, and that made her stay up all night waiting for him. True, Jaune is more than capable of taking care of himself, but Pyrrha still worries about him. It isn't like him to just take off and not give any implications of being gone for so long.

Okay, so maybe Pyrrha's being a bit of a mother hen, but can you blame her? This is her crush we're talking about!

' _Where are you, Jaune? This isn't like you at all!'_ Pyrrha thought to herself.

She was startled out of her thoughts when the alarm clock started ringing rather loudly, causing her to accidentally activate her polarity Semblance and smash it against the wall. Which just so happened to be what woke up Nora.

"What the heck, Pyrrha?! That was my only alarm clock!" Nora whined.

"I'm sorry!" Pyrrha apologized.

That's when Ren woke up and both he and Nora got a good look at the state of their teammate.

"My goodness, Pyrrha! No offense, but you look absolutely terrible!" Ren stated.

And he would be right. Pyrrha's hair was severely disheveled, her eyes were red and bloodshot with bags under them, and she was so jittery that it looked like she would either faint or jump out of her skin at the slightest sound!

"YEESH! Is the Zombie apocalypse upon us or something?! Because I think you're turning into one!" Nora added.

Pyrrha just sighed. She knew she shouldn't have stayed up all night waiting for Jaune. But she did it anyway.

"Sorry guys, I was up all night waiting for Jaune." Pyrrha explained.

"He didn't come back last night?" Ren asked.

"No. No he didn't." Pyrrha replied. "And that's what worries me."

"Oh come on, Pyrrha, our fearless leader is practically a fully accomplished and totally badass hunter who not only kept all of us together like he has for so long, but also revived the Fall Maiden and saved all of Beacon! What's the worst that could happen?" Nora said/asked.

This bit of information did absolutely nothing to ease Pyrrha's frazzled mind. If anything, it just caused her to think up over a thousand different scenarios involving things that could happen to Jaune. None of them were very good.

As fast as she could move, Pyrrha grabbed her scroll and dialed Jaune's number, praying to Monty that he would be alright and would answer her.

* * *

 _ **In a Dimly Lit Hotel Room…**_

* * *

A scroll that was set on a nightstand began ringing with a very annoying ringtone as it received a call from someone. A hand reached out from under the covers of the bed and sent the call to their voicemail before retreating back under the sheets in order for both individuals to get some more sleep.

"I thought I told professor Port to STOP sending me those custom made alarm ringtones." said a groggy boy with blonde hair.

"At least it's off now." added an equally groggy brown haired girl.

The two snuggled closer to each other and fell back asleep instantly. And neither seemed to realize that they were not alone. Nor who exactly they were with at that moment.

Boy, are these two in for a surprise when they wake up.

* * *

 _ **Back with (J)NPR…**_

* * *

 _"Hey, you've reached Jaune Arc of the Arc Family. If you're listening to this, it means I'm either doing my chores, training with Crocea Mors, or kicking Grimm behind with my team. Leave a message."_

"Nuts! It went to his voicemail!" Pyrrha said.

"It's okay, Pyrrha. I'm sure that wherever Jaune is, he is absolutely fine." Ren assured.

"Yeah! And if anyone's giving our Hero of Vale any trouble like those rabid fans that chased him earlier this month, then we'll just go over there and BREAK THEIR LEGS!" Nora added.

"Nora, we've been over this. We're not breaking anyone's legs!" Ren stated firmly.

But Pyrrha was unsure. Thinking back to that horde of rabid fanboys and fangirls (mostly girls) chasing HER knight made her want to agree with her violent friend. However, the more rational side of her mind made her wonder about something else. Was she being just the slight bit too overprotective of her partner?

…

…

…

…

NAH! Of course she wasn't!

Pyrrha couldn't ponder anything anymore because Nora tilted her head up and shoved a funnel in her mouth before dumping a whole pot of coffee down her throat. She spat out the funnel and coughed as she tried to get the air back into her lungs.

"NORA! What was THAT for?!" demanded Pyrrha.

"To wake you up, silly! You're a spartan, not a sloth!" Nora replied.

But she soon regretted her decision when she saw Pyrrha begin trembling as her pupils and irises shrank to the size of pin holes. The redhead began sputtering nonsense as she started to spazz out even more than she had been before.

"Pyrrha...? Are you okay?" Ren asked cautiously.

He got his answer as all hell broke loose in that instant.

* * *

 _ **Meanwhile: Ozpin's Office…**_

* * *

Beacon's headmaster was drinking his morning coffee as he thought back to last nights events which in turn will lead to the most entertaining chapter of his career as a teacher yet!

He knew about Jaune and Amber's little get-together. In fact, he had been very much hoping that it would happen. He knows something about the power of the four maidens that even THEY don't know about. Something that would benefit the entire world and make two certain people's lives very happy.

As it turns out, there are four warriors that if one of them and one of the maidens were to have a child, that child's power would be even greater than their parents. But I don't think I'll say anything more on that subject.

Ozpin chuckled as he watched on the viewing screen as Nora forced a whole pot of freshly brewed coffee down Pyrrha's gullet to try and help her stay awake, thus turning the spartan into a human pinball of caffeinated death!

"This is better than a science fiction novel!" Ozpin said to himself.

"I swear, you are five years old." Glynda sighed as she too watched.

Although she will admit that she found it mildly entertaining when Pyrrha ended up turning her teammates and team RWBY into human bowling pins. Not that she'll say that out loud, mind you.

* * *

 _ ***To Be Continued…***_

* * *

 _ **Short chapter, I know. But I probably won't be updating this story as often as my others, so I wanted to get this update out of the way. Hope to see some reviews for this chapter!**_


	3. Chapter 3

_**This is going to be another one of those slow chapters in my story and the chapter itself might be a little short. Maybe three or four pages long, I don't know. I'm not that good at writing stories like this one, and this is my first attempt at writing a Drunken Marriage fic. So bare with me on this, okay?**_

 _ ***I STILL DON'T OWN RWBY! SO DON'T ASK!***_

* * *

 _ **An Arc and a Maiden… Married?!**_

* * *

Lunch had finally rolled around at Beacon, and at Teams RWBY and JNPR's usual table there was a bit of light conversation going around. Mostly about the location of everyone's favorite blonde knight.

"So, Jaune really didn't come back last night?" Ruby asked.

"No, he didn't. And that's what worries me." said a still shuddering and twitching Pyrrha.

Apparently, the effects of drinking that much coffee all at once haven't completely blown over yet. And just watching her twitch like that made both teams wince. Even with Aura, they still have bruises from being turned into human/Faunus bowling pins. Bruises that really should've healed long before now.

Even Nora seemed to lose her ever present smile at the memory of what happened that morning. Clearly she understood that pouring THAT much highly caffeinated coffee down Pyrrha's gullet all at once was one of the stupidest ideas she's ever had! And for once, she's not ashamed to admit it.

 _'My poor achy back… is this how Jaune felt when he was squashed under Weiss's big butt during initiation?'_ Nora mentally asked herself.

Even Weiss was massaging on of her sore shoulders after having survived Pyrrha's coffee rampage. Maybe she'd go into Vale later today and schedule an appointment with a massage therapist. Monty Oum above knows she needs it right about now.

"This is actually very unlike Jaune. He always finds a way to make it home before curfew, so why was this any different?" Ren asked.

"Oh relax, guys. Vomit-Boy can handle himself. He's practically a full fledged hunter now, and can take care of himself easy enough. Especially against any Grimm." Yang said with a grin.

"At this point, I'd be more worried about his fan club getting their hands on him." Blake said, not looking up from her book.

That made just about everyone wince in sympathy. They've seen the damage those beasts could cause in their never ending chase to capture their objective. They couldn't be classified as either humans OR Faunus. They were just mindless zombies! Zombies with claws that are designed for ripping the clothes off of the man that they idolize, and turning their idol into a living trophy!

...I'm beginning to think I've been reading way too many Naruto fics in my time as an author.

Okay, no more fourth wall breaking! Back to the main point, everyone at this table was worried for Jaune's safety when it came to his fan club. Mostly Pyrrha, since she doesn't want some random girl Jaune doesn't know getting together with HER knight!

Okay, she knows that Velvet is a part of Jaune's fan club, but she's far more subdued than those other wild animals that call themselves people! She still knows that Pyrrha has dibs on the blonde knight.

Delusional much? When it comes to dating, NOBODY respects the code of dibs!

In Weiss's case, she wanted to try and rekindle her friendship with the blonde boy. Looking back on their friendship since the beginning of their time at Beacon, the Schnee heiress has noticed a pattern concerning certain events. Jaune tries to get a date with her, she just shoots him down every time. He helps her ask Neptune to the dance last semester and she doesn't show a hint of gratitude. He prevents her stubborn and abusive father from taking her back to Atlas… AND SHE DOESN'T SO MUCH AS OFFER A THANK YOU!

Honestly, the girl feels rather disgusted with herself. And the fact that she felt the need to speak to Winter about it didn't help matters.

As for everyone else? They were all just worried for their friend and, in Ruby's case, fellow team leader.

"What do you guys think? Should we go into Vale and try to find Jaune?" Ruby asked.

"Perhaps we should give him another two hours. If he's not back by then, we go to Vale and try to find him. Right before chewing him out for making us worry." Blake replied.

"That is a good plan. I like that plan a lot." Pyrrha said.

Having all agreed on the plan, everyone went back to eating their lunches as they thought that this situation couldn't possibly get any worse.

"Hey, maybe Vomit-Boy's late because he found himself a girlfriend and got laid last night." Yang suggested with a teasing smirk.

Everyone promptly did a spit-take in her direction, being EXTREMELY CAREFUL not to get any milk or water in her hair.

Yang just laughed it off and wiped her face with a few napkins as her friends were either thrown into coughing fits, glaring at her or both. Ee-yup! When it comes to teasing everyone, Yang's still got it!

* * *

 _ ***Meanwhile, at a Cafe in Vale…***_

* * *

Jaune and Amber were sitting together at a booth in a cafe as they tried to wrap their heads around what was now happening to them. Apparently, in their drunken states of mind they ended up getting married to each other. As proven by the marriage certificate laid out on the table in front of them.

It read 'Mr. Jaune Arc' and 'Mrs. Amber Wither-Arc'. And what puzzled them both was the fact that it was Beacon's own headmaster that married them.

"This isn't happening… This isn't happening…" Amber mumbled in a near catatonic state.

"Get ahold of yourself, Amber! It's not the end of the world!" Jaune said.

That was enough to snap her out of it, but her reaction to that statement was to slam her hands on the table and quickly stand up from her seat.

"Don't you know what happens to a Maiden if they get married and do… 'THAT'?!" Amber asked with an embarrassed blush.

But Jaune just raised an eyebrow and crossed his arms.

"What happens? And how do you know we even did that if we were both fully clothed when we woke up?" Jaune asked in return.

Amber opened her mouth to answer, but found that she couldn't find any words to answer that question. She closed her mouth and sat back down in her chair.

"Okay, you have a point." Amber admitted.

Jaune sighed and left enough Lien to pay for their orders.

"Look, why don't we just go back to Beacon and ask Ozpin what this is all about." Jaune suggested. "Besides, what's the worst that could happen? It's not like there's some kinda big legend surrounding even the legend of the Four Maidens, right?"

Jauney-Boy, you just pressed the 'Try Me Fate' button. You shouldn't have did that.

* * *

 _ ***To Be Continued…***_

* * *

 _ **Like I said, this is another one of those slow chapters in the story, so it's gonna be kinda short. Anyways, I hope you guys like this chapter. Be sure to like and follow this story and as always, I'll see you in my next chapter!**_


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